For the past 24 years, Rashida has been present for every chapter of my life.
Although we weren't childhood friends, we grew up together. First experiencing the infancy of adulthood (our first "real" jobs, love, and heartbreak); and then its adolescence (signaled by a constant vacillation between excitement and boredom with our chosen circumstances). Through daily (in our twenties), semi-weekly (in our thirties), and weekly (in our "right nows") conversations, Rashida has read the story of my life as it has been written. She knows me totally and completely, and I am blessed to call her my best friend.
Random Tidbits: Rashida became a certified personal trainer and found her first (and only) client via Craigslist; She still watches the Bachelor; She was told (in Japan) that she favors Lauryn Hill. Rashida is a proud member of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Incorporated.
My big sisters, Ronda and Renee, were "full teenagers" by the time I came around - so when I started to walk, they had already begun to fly. They were grownish: Holding down jobs, but still living at home. Coming and going when they pleased - but not without burden. "Take your sister!" was my mother's refrain when they left the house to hang out with friends. They'd sigh, then comply.
I'm not quite sure whether this responsibility was shared equally when I was a toddler - but I remember spending a lot of time at Ronda's apartment as an adolescent. There was always incense, eclectic soul music, and funky artwork. It's no wonder that I spent the majority of my 20s in coffee shops and open mics!
Random Tidbits: Ronda taught me how to spell "dictionary," shared the importance of vaseline as a protective barrier against the wind, and instructed me to put a penny in each of my loafers; She always smells SO good that even non-huggers (such as myself) will lean in.
Although I remember spending a lot of time at Ronda's apartment, I remember Renee dragging me along with her to work. When she was just a teenager, she worked at McDonald's - which meant a Happy Meal and hours in Playland. (Every kid's dream, right?) By the time Renee was in her twenties, she'd occasionally bring me along with her to West Coast Video (Blockbuster's competitor) where I was instructed to re-shelve returned videotapes. I really enjoyed this time with my big sis.
Random Tidbit: Renee is an extremely skilled (and "heavy-handed") hair-braider; She is a lover of reality cooking shows and red Twizzlers; She is extraordinarily loud and has maintained her Boston accent despite living in Cleveland, OH and Long Beach, CA.
Dying, public speaking, and coming face-to-face with a giant spider are the second, third, and fourth most feared experiences. In first place is meeting a new boo's family. I had to face this particular fear only a month into my relationship with Kevin.
Karla had made reservations for 8 (which meant I'd be hazed by 6 of the boo's relatives at once!) at Monteverde - a swanky restaurant in Chicago's West Loop. Because Kevin and I were the last to arrive (as usual), our seats had been chosen for us. I'd be seated next to his little sister - the scariest seat in the house. (After all, most mothers are polite - but sisters tend to say exactly how they feel!)
However, within moments of sliding into my seat, Karla had not only put me at ease - she had me laughing. Sure, she shared heartwarming tidbits about Kevin, and how proud she was of both his accomplishments and character. But she also talked a healthy dose of smack (mostly concerning his love for sci-fi and all things nerd). From that moment on, Karla has continued to calm my nerves while keeping me laughing.
Random Tidbits: Karla was a high school cheerleader. According to her big brother, Karla and her squad often got into trouble for some of their more "spirited" chants! (He's such a tattletale!); She loves donuts (but who doesn't?!)
I've been told that Pia is a teacher, but I've concluded that this is just a cover. Indeed, for awhile I was certain that she was a superhero - but now that she's moved right outside of Washington, D.C., the more reasonable explanation is that she is a member of "Special Ops." What other explanation could there be for a woman who rises under the cover of darkness to train like Rocky Balboa, G.I. Jane, and every athlete in a Nike commercial?
Random Tidbit: Pia used to play volleyball and was involved in gymnastics (no surprise!); She is a graduate of Hampton University (our home by the sea), and a proud member of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Incorporated.
Have you ever been caught off guard by a person who answers their phone on speaker - blasting what would otherwise be a private communique to whoever is within earshot?
On the other hand, have you ever been the person who is unexpectedly placed on speakerphone? It was the most risky aspect of the telephone. Until FaceTime.
The first time I experienced this particular horror was, of course, at Kevin's house. After gathering our snacks, I took my place on the sofa for an afternoon of "Netflix and chillin'" with Kev. It took some time before I realized that conversation was not only coming from the television, but also from his phone. Seeing my confusion, Kevin blankly stated, "Oh - I've got Joker on FaceTime." *Face palm.*
This exact scenario repeats itself all of the time. Kevin and his brother, James (Joker) are so tight that they often "FaceTime" each other in the middle of mundane tasks - and Dominique and I are obvious players in their interactions. Although I've only met Dom once, I've gotten glimpses into her daily life: Her quirks, her love of Joker and the kids, and her television viewing habits. We are basically roommates!
Random Tidbits: If you only have a few minutes to spare, don't visit her Facebook page: You'll lose hours scrolling through all of the interesting content. Dominique is a native French speaker, has traveled the world, and should absolutely have her own show on HGTV.
My tenure at a big law firm had come to a screeching halt. After a few months of bartending, I'd finally landed a position with a tiny community organization. My salary had shrunk, I'd been downgraded from an office to a cubicle, and my new boss was a complete nightmare. One of few bright spots was meeting Kelly, who slowly became one of my best friends.
I was able to witness Kelly's personality as a participant in a diversity training workshop that my organization was charged with hosting. Not only was she one of the most insightful, she also was the most comically inappropriate - providing much-needed levity. As the years (and our careers as young attorneys) moved forward, Kelly and I worked together in several other roles and, eventually, worked for the same employer.
Together, Kelly and I have labored in the trenches - and we have cried over each other's sorrows. But what I remember most are our joys: dancing in Chicago's streets, basking in the city's summertime glow, and celebrating each other's successes from near and far.
Random Tidbits: Even on some of Chicago's coldest days, Kelly refuses to wear more than a blazer during her daily commute to the office. No, she doesn't drive - she takes the subway. Like Pia, she is a yogi and Peloton queen (and, before that, it was CrossFit). For years, I've tried to convince Kelly to abandon the law and to pursue a career in fitness. No luck yet! She is a proud member of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Incorporated.
